This seems legit.

Wear sunscreen on the beach
Always park in the same spot
Mushrooms and the ocean go together really well
Looking forward to a trip is just as fun as going on a trip
Short skirts + tank top = my new uniform for life
#summer #vodka #beach

I hafta get sneaky morning drunk these days. It’s actually quite fun. I feel like a spy. It’s not as liberating as flat out drunk in the morning, but I can still find the silver lining. Because I’m an optimist.

I am currently in possession of perhaps the worse sunburn known to mankind. My body is radiating enough heat to boil noodles. But I’m not in the mood for noodles.

Beach day. #fernandinabeach #rumplemintz #party #sunburn

I work out.

Why I’m here.

On my 30 minute break on an 18 hour shift, I chose to drive home, put on some Jack Ingram and put on some eyelashes. So very Texan of me. #homesick

My job definitely does not suck. Bartending on the beach is not a bad way to get paid.

As per usual, I’ve gotten myself into quite the little mess down in Florida. Stay tuned to my misadventures because I can guarantee that while not enviable, my midlife crisis is entertaining. Let’s see what I can get into…or out of.